As the world works itself into a big fuss over a maybe/maybe not pandemic to rival the 17th Century bubonic plague, I couldn't really care less.
It seems a shame that in plagues of the past, they were a little more creative with their name choices - the Black Death of the mid-fourteenth century striking fear into the history books and the schoolchildren who read them. This time around, someone almost jokingly decided to call it Swine Flu, almost as if Pig Flu might not have a serious enough ring to it.
Do you think they decided to name it swine flu because you can't regularly find 'swine' in restaurants and therefore people can blissfully continue to order pork casseroles and bacon sandwiches when they go out to eat? I have to admit, i'd be scared shitless right now if they had called it Sausage Flu.
Without offending those poor souls who have contracted this unfortunate condition and suffered its effects, i'm still completely fearless. Why? Because i'm off on holiday.
I've heard you can get great deals to Mexico right now, but i've decided to go a little further afield. The longest flight i've ever taken - 14 hours spread across two flights. The west coast of America here I come.
I'm too excited for words. I've not had a holiday in ages, have been working hard across various jobs for nine months, trying to make life work in London on a shoestring. Finally, I can take a couple of weeks, see a bit of the world I've never seen before, take some photos and eat some delicious food (swine excluding).
Will keep you updated with some photos and stories along the way. It's time to become an American. If I meet Obama, that would be crazy. But goal number one right now - a regular streetside corndog and a budweiser, as soon as I step off the plane.